You ever watch a movie like say Face/Off for example and the whole time you’re pondering how absolutely terrible this wad of collected photographs with sound is? Yeah, me too but I also then finish that wandering question up with an answer, “I just can’t seem to get enough of it. It’s just so damn awesome.”
Now, don’t get me wrong there are some movies that are so terrible you can’t even begin to wonder why this was optioned as a film (well you can but shh). Transformers 1 & 2 and 2012 coming to mind (one for toys and other for product placement). But overall I love sitting down and watching a god awful film.
From the awesome one liners, ludicrous characters, over-acting, the gratuitous everything and the misused cussing it just makes me bust a nut. The storylines are also a work of art in and of themselves. You either get a.) so paper thin it allows for gaping plot holes allowing epic to ensue or b.) a plot so damn retardedly defying logic that after a while you just accept this new science made before your eyes.
Let’s go back to Face/Off for a second. This film embodies awesomely bad in every way. The logic of the film, well, there is no logic. Face swapping and vocal changing happens as well as apparently bone structure reformation. If you sit and try to analyze this film you will end up with a headache. There is no possible analysis. It’s simple; boobs, gun, explosions, Nic Cage.
Without Nic Cage the awesomely terrible movie would be a niche market. But somehow the dude constantly puts on these performances that are…indescribable. Here are a few examples.
But this love of terrible movies goes beyond Nic Cage being over the top crazy awesome. You got indie movies like The Room, Sharktopus and Birdemic to balance out the high budget crap movie. Wait, have you heard about Birdemic? If you haven’t check out this kick ass trailer.
Epic!!!
There is just nothing like these movies. Now I know some of these could possibly be terrible on purpose. In fact, a neo-grindhouse style if you will.
And the great thing is, you can enjoy most of these outside the influence of drugs or alcohol. That is, if you have a funny bone that caters to enjoying people sucking harshly.
Well, I don’t have anything else to say because honestly the clips provided are my evidence that you should fall in love with everything I have mentioned. Now put the bunny back in the box.
P.S. To make your dick tingle, here’s the trailer for Titanic 2.
Also posted at No Pants Provided
